JULY '24

 

"But when you ask, you must believe & not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown & tossed by the wind." 

- James 1:6

For my Gran & Paw Paw,

The ones who demonstrate love so well & encouraged my love of all things ocean.  

This painting might be my favorite one in this year's calendar.  I'm a sucker for all things ocean.  When I was a child, these precious grandparents lived on the Marshall Islands.  I wanted to be like them when I grew up, so around age three I made up my mind that I was going to be an ocean scientist.  I stuck to that throughout high school until God let me know He had something else in mind.  Even in college I waffled back and forth between my love for water with the calling to minister to children.

I ended up with a teaching degree, but even today I still say still say that my first love was always the ocean.  

 

Our verse this month comes from the letter of James in the New Testament.  It is packed full of good instruction.  As I was preparing for this devotion I kept feeling pressed to look at the letter from James as a whole.  I encourage you to do the same.  Before we even get going today, read it for yourself.  Ask the Holy Spirit to teach you.  He will- He is so very faithful.

Click here to access chapter 1 at biblegateway.com

You might even consider marking in your  bible or printing out a copy of the text.  Ask the Spirit what He wants you to notice and act accordingly.  If you're feeling a bit lost, start with noticing what James says to do and not to do.  It might look something like this:

You can see I also went back and circled when we should do the things.

If you want to use the format I used, you can access it here.

Alright.  

Read it and study it for yourself?  

Great! 

You might need to stop here and process with the Lord what He showed you.  Or you may want to keep going...

However He leads, follow.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord.  Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do."

James is talking about when we lack wisdom.  Have you been there?  I know I have.  If you lack wisdom, ask God (who, by the way, gives generously to all without finding fault).  Guess what that means?  It means you don't earn His wisdom.  You don't gain it on your own.  It is given to you.  There is a catch here- you must believe and not doubt.  James literally says that when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  He even goes so far as to say that the person who doubts shouldn't expect to receive anything from the Lord.  

Umm...whoa.  

You want to know something cool about sea jellies?  They can swim and float.  They have the capacity to do both.  The thing about it is, they aren't very strong swimmers.  They've got powerful stingers so in that sense they are strong.  But when it comes to rough waters- they go wherever the sea takes them.  When the water is rough, they (as James says) are blown and tossed by the wind.

I relate to them so much.  When life is tough I have more of a tendency to let my mind go wherever it wishes.  James says that when we are asking God for that gift of wisdom, we can't doubt.  Period.  We can't let our minds go wherever the storm takes them.  We must believe.

So then my question becomes, okay but how?  How do I ask in faith with no doubting?  Because I got to tell you- I have doubts.  

I mentioned at the beginning of this post that I wanted to be a marine biologist from the time I was 3 years old.  I didn't even see the ocean until I was about 10, but that didn't matter.  I knew even before I saw it.  When I was a senior in high school, the Lord placed the calling of children on my heart.  I had to decide if I was going to follow a career in science or a career with kids.  To say I struggled is such an understatement.  But then God confirmed it - the calling to work with children.  And then He confirmed it again and again and again.  So I went to college in Georgia instead of Florida.  Then, it was like God decided He needed to be more specific.  So He placed the people of Rwanda on my heart.  The summer before I started college all the incoming freshman read a book called An Ordinary Man.  It was written by Paul Rusesabagina.  A man who saved more than 1,200 people from genocide in the early 90's.  The movie Hotel Rwanda was based upon his life.  I had the honor of meeting him as seen in the picture below.

 

With the people of Rwanda still burning in my heart, I graduated from college.  Seven months later I was interviewing for a teacher position at a school in Kilgali, Rwanda.  It's a story for another day, but essentially I accepted the position and began preparing to move.  I looked to these verses in James and trusted that God would give me wisdom about this decision because I was believing He would do that.  He confirmed this was His will in ways I had never experienced before or since.  72 hours before buying that one-way airline ticket, all of the doors that had been opened wide closed hard & fast.  I don't know if God has ever shaken you up the way He allowed that experience to shake me - but it rattled me to my core.  I was so sure that this was His will and then almost like the flip of a switch it wasn't anymore.  There's so much more I could say about this, but I think Ill leave it for another day.  If you're curious, please reach out.  I'd be happy to talk to you :)

A few years later, God called me to a short term trip in Ghana.  Again, I went to these verses in James and pleaded with the Lord for wisdom.  My heart was broken after the events around Rwanda and I did not want to go through that again.  So I read these verses and asked the Lord to make it clear.  He did and I, again, started preparing to go.  This time, God would shatter what was leftover from the brokenness of Rwanda.  I had an anaphylactic reaction to one of the vaccines.  (Again, there's so much more I could share about this).  But what I want you to hear is that I was again sure of God's plan and again it didn't go how I thought it would.  The anaphylaxis permanently closed the door to many third world countries, including Rwanda.

After that, I struggled to come to terms with the fact that I would be here and not there.  I ended up in the last place in the world I thought I wanted to be- a private Christian school.  Once again, I took these verses in James and prayed for wisdom.  The result?  I got the job & fell in love with those kids.   Then God would again allowing things I wasn't expecting.  A few years after falling in love with the entire student body, I got a traumatic brain injury that took me out of the classroom and the school I grew to love.

This is a really long way to say: these verses are hard for me.  

"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.  But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind."

I sit with these verses today and instead of being filled with faith, I find myself full of fear.  As if to say to Him, "I've trusted you before & you broke my heart.  Now you want me to trust you again?"

I gotta tell you, dear reader, this one challenges my faith and my view of God.  When I let my circumstances influence my faith, I feel lost.  How do I have faith when my faith is broken?  The only answer I know is the Sunday school answer that rings so true: Jesus.

Mark 9:

21 And Jesus asked his father, “How long has this been happening to him?” And he said, “From childhood. 22 And it has often cast him into fire and into water, to destroy him. But if you can do anything, have compassion on us and help us.” 23 And Jesus said to him, “‘If you can!' All things are possible for one who believes.” 24 Immediately the father of the child cried out and said, “I believe; help my unbelief!” 25 And when Jesus saw that a crowd came running together, he rebuked the unclean spirit, saying to it, “You mute and deaf spirit, I command you, come out of him and never enter him again.” 26 And after crying out and convulsing him terribly, it came out, and the boy was like a corpse, so that most of them said, “He is dead.” 27 But Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him up, and he arose. 

I imagine Jesus sitting next to me and next you, just patiently waiting.  All things are possible for one who believes.  That is what Jesus said to this father before healing his boy.  I love this story because the father is so honest about where he is in his faith of Jesus.  He is not the centurion who tells Jesus to just say the word and it will be done (Matthew 8:8-13).  This father questions if Jesus can even do anything, and if He can would He have compassion and heal his boy?

I wonder if you're facing impossible today.  If you need wisdom, but it didn't work out like it was supposed to that time before.  If you worship King Jesus, you worship the God of impossibility.  Nothing is too hard for Him.  He really is patient.  I want to encourage you to be like this father, be honest.  Like really really honest with Him.  He's ready to meet you- wherever you are.

Jellyfish can float and swim.  We can do the same- so choose to swim.  Choose to believe.  Jesus is the author and perfector of our faith (Hebrews), so if you lack some belief- tell Him about it.

I love the audio on this video of jellies swimming.  Perhaps just let it play for a few minutes and ask Him to help you.  You are so deeply loved.

“The Jellyfish, a Beautiful Poisoner | Nausicaa.” Www.nausicaa.fr, 14 June 2023, www.nausicaa.fr/en/the-ocean-magazine/jellyfish-beautiful-poisoner#:~:text=Jellyfish%20are%20animals%20that%20float. Accessed 1 June 2024.